AFCC's Virtual Community... Our Stories, Tales, and Fables for the Wounded Healer: The pearl of Great Price

by Dr Kevin Kulik

She was a simple girl,
with eyes that seemed to stare right past you.
She was almost too plain,
too ordinary to mention.....
.....but I said almost!

Sally asked me one day,
"Dr. Kulik,
do you think I should be on birth control pills?"
Not knowing much about Sally’s personal history,
I responded;
" Are you asking because you are having difficulty
with your menstrual cycle,
or are you trying to prevent pregnancy?"
She looked at me a little shyly
and said with a question
"both?"

" Well Sally,
since you are asking my advise,
I would like to ask you a few questions
before I can give you a good answer,
OK?
As your Dr. I am concerned
not only about your health
but your whole well-being.
I must tell you that the statistics
I receive from the board of health
regarding sexually transmitted diseases
scare the daylights out of me,
and I’m not the one who has to worry about them.
Women like you Sally are the ones I am scared for.
Are you aware of these statistics? "
Sally "Well, no, not really."
"Sally Do you know if your sexual partner is free of disease?"
Sally said "No, I am not really sure,
we only met recently at a bar"
( Then one of those Holy Spirit moments took over
and I went outside my comfort zone)
I said, "Sally what faith are you?"
Sally said, "Catholic"
I said, "Were you raised catholic or just baptized catholic?"
" Oh Doc", Sally said "I wasn’t raised anything,
I had the most horrible childhood."
I said, "Sally, would you like to tell me about it?"
She answered by saying "Well, I guess so."

She was referred to me by a psychotherapist

and I realized there were "issues".

She was on a number of heavy psychotropic drugs

to treat her unstable emotional condition.

She was confused, angry, and seriously depressed

and had major hormonal imbalances..

An amazing story

of abuse, neglect, and dysfunction was revealed.

You see Sally related to me that her father

would throw her down the stairs

if he lost his temper.

She said she was in therapy

because she couldn’t remember

most of her childhood

but would have some memories of abuse.

She was the last of 5 children

now at the age of 39

all still living at home in a very dysfunctional house.

It seemed that they all suffered from alcoholism,

and emotional dysfunction as well.

She was a very heavy smoker,

drinker, and sexually active.

Her sexual partner at the time

was also an alcoholic and very abusive.

She was caught up in a nightmare
and was unable to wake up.

I asked her if it would be OK
if I prayed for her
and she said "yes"
The next few minutes I said the most magical,
incredibly constructed prayer ever to be heard
by the likes of even the angels and saints.
NOT!
If you have been reading my stuff,
you know by now that just by simply praying
what is on your heart
allows God to move mountains!
No need for degrees in theology
or homiletics here,
Sally needed to know that someone
by the name of Jesus loved her,
and Jesus picked me to deliver the message!
Now unlike so many other patients I prayed with,
Sally seemed to be unmoved by my prayer
... so I thought.

About 1 month later Sally comes in
with a big grin on her face
and tells me she joined a born again church.
I asked her if she was happy
and she replied she was.
Within a short time she seemed restless again
and started to fall back into some old habits.
She asked me again what I thought she should do.
I remarked that she was unhappy
because of a divided heart.
She couldn’t have a spiritual relationship
while pursuing a sinful one.

I said to her
"Do you know that it is a very serious (mortal) sin
to have sex outside of marriage?"
"It is?" she said in curiosity.
"Yes."
Sally I would like to introduce you to your mother.
Sally said, "Oh I hate my mother!
She never says anything good about me.
As a matter of fact I don’t think she has any love for me at all."
I said "No Sally, I’m talking about another mother,
one who loves you more than you can possibly know.
Do you want a mother like that Sally?"
Sally said " Oh if it were only possible."
I asked her if she knew how to say the rosary.
and she said,
"No"
I said "Jesus gave His mother Mary
to us on the cross before He died.
Mary’s special children learn
about her relationship with Jesus
by saying the rosary
and many promises are given
to those who pray them."
She said "Promises, what promises?"
It just so happened that I had a pamphlet
with the promises printed on them,
which read like this:

FIFTEEN PROMISES OF THE BLESSED VIRGIN

TO CHRISTIANS WHO FAITHFULLY PRAY THE ROSARY

To all those who shall pray my Rosary devoutly,
I promise my special protection and great graces.
Those who shall persevere in the recitation of my Rosary
will receive some special grace.
The Rosary will be a very powerful armor against hell;
it will destroy vice, deliver from sin and dispel heresy.
The rosary will make virtue and good works flourish,
and will obtain for souls the most abundant divine mercies.
It will draw the hearts of men from the love of the world
and its vanities,
and will lift them to the desire of eternal things.
Oh, that souls would sanctify themselves by this means.
Those who trust themselves to me
through the Rosary will not perish.
Whoever recites my Rosary devoutly
reflecting on the mysteries,
shall never be overwhelmed by misfortune.
He will not experience the anger of God
nor will he perish by an unprovided death.
The sinner will be converted;
the just will persevere in grace and merit eternal life.
Those truly devoted to my Rosary
shall not die without the sacraments of the Church.
Those who are faithful to recite my Rosary
shall have during their life and at their death
the light of God
and the plenitude of His graces
and will share in the merits of the blessed.
I will deliver promptly from purgatory
souls devoted to my Rosary.
True children of my Rosary
will enjoy great glory in heaven.
What you shall ask
through my Rosary you shall obtain.
To those who propagate my Rosary
I promise aid in all their necessities.
I have obtained from my Son
that all the members of the Rosary Confraternity
shall have as their intercessors,
in life and in death, the entire celestial court.
Those who recite my Rosary faithfully
are my beloved children,
the brothers and sisters of Jesus Christ.
Devotion to my Rosary
is a special sign of predestination.

Sally asked "Could you teach me the rosary?"
"Of course Sally, I would love to!"
So I gave her a rosary and a booklet
and told her if she had any more questions about it,
she could ask me anytime.
Total time invested: about 20 minutes
Now let me tell you the fruit of those 20 minutes
I saw Sally about 1 month later
and she was literally glowing!
She told me she
"reverted" back to the catholic church,
was saying a daily rosary
(which she said gave her tremendous comfort).
She stopped drinking,
so she stopped hanging around bars
and gave up the alcoholic relationship,
because of that
she became sexually abstinent,
and because she liked to light up a smoke
when she had a drink,
she did not see the need to smoke anymore either!
You see how one sin gives birth to another?
Conversely one virtue does likewise!
Sally visits me regularly
and has made incredible progress
in her personal and spiritual life.

I’ll never forget the time she came in on her
40th birthday.
My staff had indicated it was her
special big "40"
so I wished her happy birthday.
She just wasn’t her usual happy self
so I said, "What is it Sally?"
She remarked "Well I guess I’m kinda hurt."
"By what?" I said
Then my heart broke when she said
"Well nobody even remembered my birthday today
not even my family and that hurts"
I prayed with Sally
and for all the hurts in her life
and then I gave her a Benedictine Cross.
Well you would have thought
she had just won the lottery!
She has worn that cross daily
now for over 5 years
as a commitment to God
and to remind her that it is He that heals
her from the foot of the cross.
She has learned that prayer changes families
and although there has been progress
within her own family,
the biggest progress
is that she now trusts that God
is in charge of her family.
She knows that she can’t change anyone
but herself.
She no longer has anxiety over being married
or having children,
she knows that she is loved.

I think of the dozens of Sallys
that walk by us each day unnoticed,
the "nobodies" of society,
that when asked how they are doing politely respond,
"fine".

( aka: feelings inside not expressed )
These are the very precious pearls of great price
that we trade for the rust and decay of the
"rich and famous".
Doctors seize the day!
Create real wealth that will last forever!

Dr Kevin Kulik practices on Long Island NY.

It is his hope and prayer to inspire the Catholic to "Be Christ" by his stories.

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